john mann poems

smoke 'em if you got 'em

Menu

Skip to content
  • Home
  • About
Posted on June 29, 2014 by johnmannpoems
1

Tornado

Live in the real
cries the voice at the bottom
of the dial. The sky
paints itself blue-black.
Small animals with teeth
race across the fields.
Stars are rising hot and white.
Pack your bags now
Listen for further

Share this:

  • Click to share on X (Opens in new window) X
  • Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window) Facebook
Like Loading...

Related

This entry was posted in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

Post navigation

← Copay Now, Mr. Mann
My Cat Jack →

Recent Posts

  • Mr. Mann Queries Exit Strategies
  • Mr. Mann Joins the Stream
  • ban-loca
  • Family
  • Illness

One comment

  1. Steve Leek's avatar
    Steve Leek
    June 29, 2014 at 9:01 pm

    For grins I tried reordering the lines. I think it’s best, if possible to start with a stong visual image,
    so “The sky paints itself blue black.” Is the place to start. Right away it’s ominous, which is the dominant emotion. The first sentence is a nice imprecation, almost evangelical in tone. I think it’s a great ending line. I’m not sure about “listen for further” because it is clever, and clever doesn’t always mix with dread. The poem is too short to be adding facets I think, or, keep it if you are fond of it

    Reply

Leave a comment Cancel reply

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Join 211 other subscribers

Categories

Archives

Blogroll

  • Bookmark Buzz
  • I May Be Some Time
  • National Poetry Review
  • National Poetry Review Press
  • out of our minds
  • Verse Daily
  • wabi-sabi daily
Blog at WordPress.com.
  • Facebook
  • Comment
  • Reblog
  • Subscribe Subscribed
    • john mann poems
    • Join 41 other subscribers
    • Already have a WordPress.com account? Log in now.
    • john mann poems
    • Subscribe Subscribed
    • Sign up
    • Log in
    • Copy shortlink
    • Report this content
    • View post in Reader
    • Manage subscriptions
    • Collapse this bar
%d